writing_shadows

((Hey, so this is my first attempt at an October challenge. Well... not quite true as I am also writing something for Sheena but I haven't managed to finish that one yet. This one does have some creative license applied to it and I would ask that people bear that in mind, though I suppose it goes without saying for these posts.))

“Arthur said that you understand Russian.” Aleksander’s words made her breath catch in her throat and her heart start to hammer. She felt trapped all of a sudden, panic mounting within her, “I have to know if you are her, if you could be.”

Aline turned from him, unable to bear the look of anger and desperation on his face, “I don’t think I can be, you don’t remember me and you have seen how I look with my Mask up. It’s just a coincidence, but if you must be sure...” She moved and fetched out a photograph of herself, a recent one and handed it over to him.

He took the photo and stepped closer to her, one hand stroking her cheek gently, “I’ll show it to my family, to her mother. They will know if it looks like she did. We’ll talk again once I know.” With that he turned and left, leaving her in the terrified grip of her own thoughts.

Before she knew it she was gathering up some of her things and putting them away in a bag, everything she might need to leave and head somewhere else to start again. She couldn’t stay, if she stayed then one of two things would happen, that she would find out she was his love and accidentally betray him or that she wasn’t and would be left heartbroken and alone. Either way it was too dangerous for her to stay.

Locking up the flat she sat in her car for a long moment as it suddenly hit her what she was about to do. She knew that it was a risk to her stability of self, but she feared the consequences of staying more. Breaking down into tears, it took her a long while to compose herself enough to start the car. She would go to Cormac; he would be able to help her find a new identity and somewhere else to live. If she stayed away from Lost society and kept to herself then maybe she could hide deep enough to be safe of the shadow of her past that haunted her into flight.

* * *

It was quiet here by the loch and Aline liked to come here to sit and think, sometimes talking to the swans if there were any around. It had been almost six months since her flight from Edinburgh, since Cormac had helped her move somewhere quiet and peaceful and away from people. Here she wrote songs under a pen name and made a tidy living for herself. There was a small village a short distance away and she could go there for supplies without really making much of an impact. It was quiet and it was safe and while her heart still ached for what she had left behind, Winter had wrapped her up further in its cloak and made the loss easier to bear.

She was so lost in her own thoughts that she failed to hear someone approach, the reaction of the swans being her first clue that she was not alone. Gracefully and quickly she sprung to her feet and turned, her heart catching in her throat and panic rising as she saw Aleksander standing there. Somehow he had managed to find her and all her peace of mind shattered instantly.

Before she could really react he grabbed hold of her hand and pulled her towards him and kissed her passionately. She reeled as something inside her mind seemed to click and a flood of memories swept through her and for the first time since she had escaped she knew who she was.

“Why Nadya, my love? Why did you run from me?” Aleksander asked quietly in Russian, still holding her close to him.

“I was afraid. I...” She paused and pulled back a moment, “I was afraid to find out who I really was and I do know now, somehow when you kissed me...” She shook her head, “But that is not the issue. There is something bad I must tell you love. I did not escape Arcadia on my own. Your Keeper, it must have been your Keeper, she released me but on a promise. A promise that if I ever found my love I must give him something from her. At the time I didn’t know what they meant and I was desperate to be free before I lost my mind entirely and so I agreed. Once I was out though and I understood I had promised myself never to try and find the truth so I would never have to keep such a terrible promise.”

Aleksander stroked her cheek again and looked at her tenderly, “What did you promise to give me?” He asked her quietly.

Fumbling, Nadya reached into her coat pocket and pulled out the ring box that she kept the thing in and held it up to show him, “This.”

Without warning Aleksander took the box from her and opened it to reveal a golden wedding band. Idly he reached in to touch it and then a whoosh of icy cold air blasted them both and knocked Nadya to the ground.

Picking herself back up she saw that there was no sign of Aleksander, both him and the ring had gone. Heartbroken beyond words she sunk back down to the ground, sobbing her heart out as she realised that her darkest of nightmares had just been realised. Her love was gone forever and it was no one’s fault but hers.