Warning: Voluble when drunk

[badgersandjam.livejournal.com]

Kath opined to me before the National that there weren't very many entries for the writing competition in the Summer Games for Changeling.  I had wanted to write one, but then thought--Expression 1, not likely.  Plus, Rea isn't exactly voluble.  But then I thought, you know, she's quite voluble after an evening's drinking.  And the phrase "It was a dark and stormy night" popped unbidden into my head.  And I thought, "If someone recorded what she said, I could get speech patterns and things down."  And thus was born the following:

A Romance, Maybe

Told by Rea late one night over whisky.  Transcribed by A Gentleman.

 

It was a stormy night.

Course it was dark.  It was night.  What?  That’s stupid.  No, fine, I’ll start again.

It was a dark and stormy night.  (Better?)  It was stormy because Carin was angry.  It was raining because Rosie was making it rain, so that as Carin stormed through the gardens his shirt clung to him in a Romantic Fashion.  His hair was too long though, so it dripped down his face.  Rosie said it made him look like he was crying for a lost love.  Rosie sighed.

Rosie is like that.  If Rosie lost a love it would be on the high seas, or in the greenwood, or in the direst of peril, like trapped on a beach with an incoming tide and no coconuts.  Only all of those would have capital letters.    Rosie would never lose a love down the back of a sofa or behind a chalkboard.  So that would be a good place to hide one.

Coconuts float.  That’s why.

Anyhow.  Earlier there had been shouting, and crashing.  That wasn’t unusual.  Aria had been over and usually there was crashing when Aria was over.  Jack once said on average every sixth time Aria visited we needed new plates.  Jack also put different dishes in the kitchen each time to see if she preferred certain shapes.  Jack is like that, sometimes.  He experiments.

It hadn’t been the kitchen this time.  They’d argued upstairs.  One of the windows was gone.  Aria had run out.  Carin was in a temper.  He searched and searched and searched outside and I was out of the good stuff so I let him.  Actually, I was trying to figure out where to get stronger glass.  I was also moving bits of the garden around him so he didn’t stomp on the flowers.  I like that garden.

I can’t tell you exactly what he said, but you’ve seen him in a temper, and he’s Summer, so you get a good idea.  He can get very inventive.  And Aria had hit him where it hurt.  She’d broken an antique he liked; thrown it out the window.  It fell on the paving.  Shards everywhere.

He picked up the pieces he could find.  But there was a bit of the frame missing.  He finally found it, drenched to the skin and having cut his fingers on one of the shards.  It had flower carved into it.  A Rose.  He looked into the bit of mirror that stuck to it, stopped, touched his cheek and then carefully wiped off Aria’s lipstick with a handkerchief that was mostly dry.  Then he took the mirror into the workshop.

Rosie let the moon come out again.

Well, that’s what happened.  You want a better story, don’t ask an elemental.

 

Comments

[becky-spence.livejournal.com]

Square plates, clearly.

Years of living with Toad and her hatred for round objects makes Aria a dab hand at throwing non-circular objects :)

[unifex.livejournal.com]

And the important lesson to take out of this is obviously that she throws plates at me. Which means that I'm the good guy.

[becky-spence.livejournal.com]

You know, I can't help but feel there's a few elements of our original character linking I should have questionned more closely...See, I'd always assumed you'd give as good as you got :P

Stupid Clarity 9...*mutters darkly*

Just, you know, learn to DUCK! It'd go better for you then...

[unifex.livejournal.com]

Y'see, to be fair, I absolutely certainly do deserve it in places, and withotu a shadow of a doubt I should get things thrown at me.

Just because I can't hurt people, doesn't mean I can't deserve plating. After all, when one is feeling petty, vidicitive, angry, upset, Carinlike, or irked, the absolute truth can also hbe a fairly offensive thing.

[annwfyn.livejournal.com]

Ooooh...I like that. That's got some lovely imagery and fantastic use of language.

That rocks.

[badgersandjam.livejournal.com]

*blush* Thanks.

[annwfyn.livejournal.com]

Jen - would you be OK with us nabbing this for the fanzine?