writing_shadows

If someone asks me what my Court is about, I tell them ‘Desire’. But that’s not an answer. If anything, it’s an whole other question.

Desire is the most important thing to a Spring Courtier. We do a sideline in Hope, and a sideline in Joy, but they’re just aspects of Desire – Hope is that wish for a Desire to be fulfilled, and Joy is one of the feelings you can get when they are. But it all comes back to Desire, in the end.

What is Desire, then?

It’s whatever you want it to be.

Another evasion, another truth that isn’t any help at all. Like so much of talking about Court.

At the simplest level, a Desire is something you want. It’s anything from a cold drink on a hot day, to wanting to rip the clothes of the person next to you and screw them senseless.

Those Desires, they aren’t always nice. Worst of all, they don’t always match up with other people’s. Sometimes, they do, and when they do, life can get very, very interesting. But most often, then don’t.

Everyone sees things differently. Some look to themselves, and their Desires, while some spend their time tending to other people’s.

Some say, and I’ve said it before myself, that Spring is about going after what you want, and doing all you can to get it. These days, I’m not so sure.

I think that’s part of it, like helping others get their Desires is part of it. But there are times when you shouldn’t, because like I said before, people’s Desires don’t always match up. Maybe I want something, and maybe you want it to. But we can’t both have it. Maybe I want something you have, or maybe I want to do something to you that you don’t want me to do. Then what happens?

Does the strongest Desire win out? If I want it more than you, do I get my way over yours? Maybe. I can’t tell you for sure.

But what I do know, is that what matters is knowing what you want. Knowing your Desire, whether you act on it or not. Accepting it and not hiding ever from it. Because your Desires bring you Hope, they bring you Joy. They can cause Wrath, and bring you Sorrow, but you should never, ever have Fear of them.

We’re all are own people, free to do whatever we want to do. And the first step on doing that is knowing what we Desire.

And for me, that’s what Desire is about. That’s what Spring is about.