writing_shadows

Slow, steady strokes across the oil-slick stone; the scratching soft, like the purr of a violin string as the last note fades.

Destiny, like the knife, two-edged.

"You can't escape your fate," she said. I told her that she was wrong, but... Here I am, Master of Fate once more, but more her bitch than I have been in years. Not since I lost my powers have I felt it so strongly; the need to be in command, to have others follow because my understanding of who should live or die is superior.

That urge to lead, to rule, to conquer, is the tug of the destiny I thought I had left behind. I can see it in my future again, if only as a misty dream; my golden age, my benevolent, enlightened dictatorship of the awakened will.

The edge of the blade is like a razor. Perrun could probably make it sharper, but suddenly the keenness of it sickens me; it is as though I can hear it crying out to be blooded.

I know have it in me to become a power in the world; a man of destiny, ruling over an era of peace and enlightenment that will pave the way to Hieraconis. I know this, as surely as I know that the stones of that path will be mortared with the blood of millions.

My hand is shaking as I sheath the knife and I catch my finger with the blade. It's so sharp that I don't feel anything until the blood wells.

My hands are bloody; the metaphor seems apt. I wonder if there is any way to truly resist my destiny, other than to let the knife do its work on me.

"Changing your destiny is one of the biggest and bravest and hardest things a person can ever do. But you did it, and you're still doing it. And you don't have to do it alone any more," she promised.

I will change. I can change.

I sheath the knife and place it in my bag. It's time to be the star again; leave the warrior behind. The act is harder now, but my facade has not faltered yet. I will find solace in the music and comfort in my love.

I shall undo that which should never have been done and so make some small amends for the harm I caused in my pride.

I will find my humility again, and I shall keep my back turned upon my destiny.